またね

Last day of the semester at Culinary Practicum, 24th August 2012

Despite of the subject being tedious, the reason why I loved those sufferings was because of the wonderful chefs and that I could experience something so indescribable. School could never have been more sensational than during that period. Days went by quickly. As I woke at around 5:30am, unknowingly it would soon be 5pm already.

Something I enjoyed very much was the view of the sky I got to admire upon while I'm waiting for the bus at the bus stop. Dawn is amazing... At times, I would be able to catch a glimpse of the soon-disappearing moon and stars.. There's a light that has been there for the past many months.. which is a satellite. Still, it enhanced the beauty of the sky... haha..

I also enjoyed the rushing and anxieties I get, while my group and I are trying hard to churn out the food to customers.. and chefs for marking.. Despite of being an untidy person.. (oh which I have to clean up my room soon... its in a mess..) I did my best to clean up the kitchens and just did not treat it as a burden, rather, something that I just gotta do.. that's all.

While in school, as I heard the laughters and chattering of those people around me, somehow I would feel my heart tightening up. I was probably just blending in. A tinge of loneliness, yet I know that it is all because of me. I subconsciously chose to not be with them. It's not that they are bad people, but rather, I just felt that trying to be with them was tiring for me.. Still, I've made quite decent relationships with some of them and I like my coursemates on a whole.

There was a lot of procrastination going on about during the past couple of months.
"Hey I have to study.. nah.. I'll just listen to music for a moment.."
" I'll try to be closer to them.. No... they do not appreciate my actual presence.."
"It doesn't matter if i score badly.. Ah.. the grades are affecting me"

During the Commis Challenge, there were screw ups and I realised that we were all trying to push the faults and blame to one another. As I thought through about it while on my way home, I got sick at myself. I put up a smile and said that it was okay when deep inside I was really frustrated, attempting to make myself feel better by believing that it was their fault.

Then there was the award ceremony.. Our names did not appear in the list yet... so I thought.. "what's left is the Gold and Silver award.. obviously we would be stuck at Silver.." So yea we did, but I was neither picking and grumbling about it, nor was I delighted about it.. Shaking hands with the presenter and smiling at the camera was such a burden to me as I really did not know how to react to it. As I think about it now, I really am grateful for this Silver..

Well, I am thankful towards the chefs.. lecturers and fellow coursemates for their presence.. I really am...
I've experienced much kindness, concern and love out of them... Well, I'll see them around in two months time during my next subject at Service Practicum. I'll try my best to get closer to them!!

Yeap... that's all.. (' u `)

Ps: I just collected my cosplay uniform. It's great! but requires some addition of details.. I'll go get my mic probably next week.. and I'll be going to the Singapore Expo later on, to give my support to Nico Nico Utaite, Nagi !!